The Weight of Truth
Umm…is not comfortable.
I started writing when I was 4 years old. I always looked at people and ask of their opinion in my writings, no novels….just messy stuff. All they can see is my effort for not going out of the lines and also the way whatever I wrote looks like. They say: “Wow! This letters look beautiful”. So my focus was in the way they were drawn. No computers back there, so now I can focus in some meaning. Or I least I’m trying.
Grammar? You asked? I know, its unbelievable, just like somebody is trying to paint those classics by Picasso (whatever it comes…sort of). Well, when someone has something to say, or to express, no matter how neat, I guess that if is simple, that counts.
One memorable time I wrote for someone (that was my first serious chance), it was a speech, I just wrote it and took like 4 or 5 hours to done it. The person to read it was sort of nasty to me (He was like…Is it ready jet? Do you have it? I have no time to help you! Can you bring it?), I wasn’t Christian back there. So you know what I did? (funny).
Ok. Here goes. I wrote that paper, it was amazing. I gaze at every single paragraph because looks like Mr Emerson came walking to my house to taught me how. It was really something. But was never read it in public. How sad, right? I did it! I went to the closing Ceremony at the place where we (co-workers and I) assist for 6 weeks or so. I seat there watching all happen until they call our group, and the leader chosen to speak was called. He barely touch my arm, straight his hand and ask for the paper, to what I said….me? sorry I didn’t do it. Well, my expectations got challenged that season.
I just wanted to see how well a man can speak without preparation? no. At all. I want to see how much brain is behind this handsome and unbelievable guy. SO? He did good, really good. He wasn’t surprise, I was.
That was how public went my first writing. Later in time I wrote something for the Puericultorio (children’s home) where I use to volunteer, I wrote some messages for Parents and the kids. I draw some Disney colorful friendly little animated toys around the whole mural. It was good. Just then I began to think about writing something else, like not just to my little tiny world, but who knows? may be for the masses. Even if to gain that knowledge I got to study.
I never study, may be in the future. Now I just want to express anything I’m learning in this season. I’m human, not perfect, women (has nothing to do with the non perfect…hahaha). But in the end I am craving to speak, I wonder if all writers, or anybody who has a Blog, I wonder if they all felt this way. Is like I have a kind of dictation out of my self. Like it has to be the way my life goes….manifesting, expressing, sharing, talking, talking, talking.
The worst part I believe is when you just not only try on writing something “else”, but when you want to share what you believe is the truth. Either in paper, blog, anything. How about those times when you talked and is really something, and then someone got the “hunch” and felt exhort for some girl who is so empty of authority (I meant, if a person with a real worldly authority would do this, may be make more sence…but a girl?), like the whole atmosphere goes gray. I feel it. But I do not dwell on it, just got me thinking. Can I have some greater room some day? some day?
The weight of Truth comes thru anyone, not requirements. So if some of us is the one with the post, is a matter of standing strong and knowing that we may know the truth, that we someday may understand more of it, but that we are just partakers of it, it belongs to all equally. I believe that if someone re-produce it, or re-present it, doesn’t makes us less human. To express something really relevant carries its own weight, and I believe that f I had sign for it got to be really fun. Otherwise I will not do it. Writing for me is fun, like talking, like just expressing. Reactions aren’t always fun, but that was exactly what bring me to write, I belive, it was a need for telling my version on the Truth. My world.
Tell me then…What’s yours? Why do you write…Really? What motivates you to? Really? Are you having fun?
I will like to know, and thanks for the Feedback. Great Love to you. ~Mirian 🙂