Peeling the orange's Blog

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One Of The Boys

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“There is not need for anyone to walk that far to be found by God. He is near. Near as one’s breath.” ~Unknown.

I had this nudging question consuming my every thought about how to fix the mess that my life was. I want to be someone so badly, but when looking at my steps all was a picture of non sense, to me. Like I need it, someone to come to agreement with me, but no just anyone, someone with the faith, the experience, the power, and the ability. Who’s that?

I come to learn that to God it is better to have children with troubles that no children at all. That’s good news to me. I am in for a retreat. I need it that fusion; my gifts and His ability sure make a killer weapon. What we want to kill together?…unbelief, struggles, depression, confusion, desperation. When is true that there is a season for all these to have its own attention, is also true that is just “a season”. Get it? Just a season.

Well, where to start?

Here. I had all kinds of thoughts. Yes, those too.

All started when I was born, like anyone. But I just got “informed” of it all as I began to search for more in life. Like one goes into a tremendous inventory and yes, behind those boxes is the entire mold. I had those apparently thoughts of self-confidence and it went too far. At once I believe that I can alone fix my head by just re-adjusting to the rules. But it wasn’t my mind that needed to be born again, but my heart.

Unwanted feelings represent unresolved issues and unmet needs. These are what I fight back then, with all of my guts. When I was tired, was nothing else, just the wall and me. I always look at my situation like as a humble person, but is not a humble one the one that come to agreement with God? I thought that He talks to people with blue collar, but I was wrong, He was there for me. What I used to call humble, wasn’t really that. I was at the tip of the mountain. Thoughts, horrible ones, even those who put you to think backwards, yes, those too. Wicked. Then, in a second I realize that my heart was so fill with more than mistakes or ignorance. My old nature was horrible.

I was kind of Daniel kind of girl. And every Network has a Daniel, so I was ok. Always being the smartest one, fixing everything, meeting all needs, making everyone happy. But how about me? Huh?

I just need it the words of God to bring healing in my life, just one breath, close as the wind, and HE was made acknowledge in my own path. The so “far from home Creator” became my best pal. I little by little began to see His love at every step of the way. I remember those thoughts of homosexuality arousing in my head and heart. Yes, those that make you think that is a global universe and if lots of people are doing it, why not me? The world has change, right? Why not? And I’m the only one hurt here, so why not to try? Then…as I was about to put one more seed in that obscure and even consuming dominion, I was reminded….I am It? I am It?

To believe in God became the prove to me about being or not really humble, not that I want to win a price, but if I really want to do the right thing. Not just have the ability to do what I want, but the ability to do what is right. It is right to hurt my life? NO. Then, back off. I went to think outside the box and began to listen to videos, or books. I found one recently by Sy Rogers here. “Whether you or your family are facing similar struggles or you want a better understanding of these issues and the character of God, this encouraging and inspiring message is for you” ~Sy Rogers.

Feedback, the Breakfast of Champions. I always considered that to be true. But I wasn’t totally aware of who is and who is not a great source of feedback to me. I was so attach to this friend of mine; I did not realize that she was having this confusion. The day I realize it that was the day of the tribulations, and I was thisclose to fall into that fight. I was in kind of one, but I did not care, for her and of course for me. It was a horrible moment. But I defended my new heart at all cost. Stepping inside my place and moving no where from where God has placing me already. Messy head started to plug in to the supernatural love of God, when I need it the most, He was faithful. He is. We just need a glimpse of God, and He is so near, that if I did not cry out that Sunday…who knows where in the world I would be by now. For only His word creates a Reality, and He was with me there, and ever since, and that was the moment where I fought to stay with His word and not with my pain. No Anymore! That was the primary feedback. Supernatural isn’t weird anymore, is cool, close, simple, loving, caring, honest, free, unselfish, like a well of water happy for you to drink of IT.

God’s word plus believe can do Miracles. The Abilities of The Provider.

I then, that afternoon understood that God can touch ANYONE. I understood that to agree with Him is to be humble. Just took for me to have an unoffended heart and trust God even if I can’t see Him, just trust in His word. Written word. In hearts on flesh. Like yours, like mine.

So, Means vs. God’s Word don’t take often some real state? For that I have His love that reminds me of the true. His love benefits me, His love transcends my mind, His love influence me in a way that any other thing or person can’t. God is real and so cool. I would even said…Down to earth. Better that any famous person on earth. He is Holy, but also He is a friend. A gentleman.

When we love God then is easy to obey, does not look as an obligation but as a response to such amazing, caring, perfect, awesome, pure, irresistible love of God. He is good. God’s unsearchable Grace is here. At hand reach. Close as your heart bits. He is Near. Forever. God is good!

Today, Pray for that Miracle. “)

2 Responses

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  1. After much thinking I believe your title “oneoftheboys peeling the orange&#039s…” and many other things cause me to spend more time on your blog.

  2. I’m glad that You are having fun! That’s the point!
    God Bless you!
    ~Great Love to you,
    Mirian Aracely.

    “)

    peelingtheorange

    June 23, 2010 at 12:37 am


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