Fun “Things You Do Not Want To Hear In Surgery”
1.) Better save that. We’ll need it for the autopsy.
2.) Somebody call the janitor – we’re going to need a mop
3.) ‘Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness’
4.) Sparky! Comeback with that! Bad Dog!
5.) Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that?
6.) Hand me that…uh…that uh…..thingie
7.) Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
8.) Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived a full hypo of this stuff before?
9.) Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
10.) Could you stop that thing from beating; it’s throwing my concentration off
11.) What’s this doing here?
12.) I hate it when they’re missing stuff in here.
13.) That’s cool! now can you make his leg twitch?!
14.) I wish I hadn’t forgotten my glasses.
15.) Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.
16.) Sterile, shcmeril. The floor’s clean, right?
17.) Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
18.) Next, we remove the subject’s brain and place it in the body of the ape.
19.) Now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.
20.) This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
21.) Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?
22.) Don’t worry. I think it is sharp enough.
23.) What do you mean ‘You want a divorce’!
24.) She’s gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!
25.) FIRE! FIRE! Everybody get out!
26.) ‘And next week, we’ll be learning how to stitch up a patient…’