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Posts Tagged ‘surgery

Fun “Things You Do Not Want To┬áHear In Surgery”

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1.) Better save that. We’ll need it for the autopsy.

2.) Somebody call the janitor – we’re going to need a mop

3.) ‘Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness’

4.) Sparky! Comeback with that! Bad Dog!

5.) Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what’s that?

6.) Hand me that…uh…that uh…..thingie

7.) Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.

8.) Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived a full hypo of this stuff before?

9.) Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!

10.) Could you stop that thing from beating; it’s throwing my concentration off

11.) What’s this doing here?

12.) I hate it when they’re missing stuff in here.

13.) That’s cool! now can you make his leg twitch?!

14.) I wish I hadn’t forgotten my glasses.

15.) Well folks, this will be an experiment for all of us.

16.) Sterile, shcmeril. The floor’s clean, right?

17.) Anyone see where I left that scalpel?

18.) Next, we remove the subject’s brain and place it in the body of the ape.

19.) Now take a picture from this angle. This is truly a freak of nature.

20.) This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?

21.) Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donation card?

22.) Don’t worry. I think it is sharp enough.

23.) What do you mean ‘You want a divorce’!

24.) She’s gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!

25.) FIRE! FIRE! Everybody get out!

26.) ‘And next week, we’ll be learning how to stitch up a patient…’


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